Before kids, you could find my husband and I jumping out of planes (okay only did this once), road tripping across country or frequenting any karaoke bar any night of our choosing. Alas, those days of freedom are long gone. As parents to 3 young children, it feels more like my husband and are in a neverending game of hot potato…
Husband: “You take the kids, I have to shower.”
Me: “Now it’s your turn, I need to run to target.”
Husband: “Can you give the kids a bath, I need a break.”
Me: “Okay then you read them a story and put them to bed.”
7 days a week, 24 hours a day. Parenthood can be exhausting to put it lightly, and often times your marriage goes on the back burner. I’m guilty of it. You’re guilty of it.
And I’m here to give you a solution to this problem… leave your kids behind! Okay, this sounds a bit dramatic (i.e. the title of this article) but this technique is highly affective for our marriage. For some, it’s weekly date nights, for others it’s scheduling their sexy time. For my parents, who had 12 kids, it was meeting up at a local motel and locking their kids out of their bedroom on the one night a week my dad had off.
For us, it’s trips without our kids! To be able to take off the “mom hat” and just be present with my man is so important. We are both transported to a simpler time with no restriction on time, schedule or snack demands. Not everyone has a back-up to watch their kids, so it takes creativity, swapping kids-free weekends with another mom friend or family member could work. For us, we are very lucky to have my incredible mother and father-in-law to watch over our kiddos.
Not gonna lie, the first few times we left our kids, I was filled with anxiety and guilt but now I realize THEY are the ones who benefit the most from mommy and daddy getting away together. Because we are able to connect more as couple, we both are way better parents to our kids. It’s not enough to just love my kids unconditionally… building a strong, intimate bond with my man makes for a more loving enviornment for our children too.
by Lucy Riles, Life of Mom Co-Founder