All events in this story are 100% accurate and based on a true story…
Earlier this week, my mother-in-law came up to take care of my kids so that my husband and I could attend a conference. Since my husband does a lot of hosting and emceeing events, he had ordered some new tailored suits that also happened to arrived this week. My mother-in-law, who happens to be a mix between Mother Teresa/Carol Brady/Martha Stewart, offered to iron his newly tailored suit and shirts. Well seeing that I do all my ironing in the dryer with a damp hand towel, my husband jumped at the offer… poor guy has lived in wrinkled clothes for the past decade.
So picture this… kids playing in the playroom while my MIL is ironing in the living room. And since my 5yr old has an internal snack alarm clock that goes off every 15mins, he walks into the living room and stops in his tracks… the shock, the awe, the uncertainty takes over as he meekly asks…
Son: Mimi, what IS that?
MIL: It’s an ironing board.
Son: And what is THAT?
MIL: It’s an iron.
Son: What does it do?
MIL: politely laughs it off and continues ironing.
Myself, on the other hand, dies a slow death of embarrassment as my kid has just completely called me out in front of my mother-in-law. And as if that wasn’t enough, my littlest Brutus walks in seconds after her brother and while not yet able to fully talk, managed to signal and point at these foreign objects too that has invaded our living room. She then proceeds to yell and point at it, trying to make it go away… just go ahead and add more salt to the wound kid. Okay, we get it, MOMMY DOESN’T IRON so my children have no idea what an iron and ironing board are.iron: a ductile, malleable, silver-white metallic element, scarcely known in a pure condition, but much used in its crude or impure carbon-containing forms for making tools, implements, machinery, etc.
Now my MIL already knows I can’t cook for the life of me, and now my own little bambinos have betrayed me, exposing yet another domestic task I have failed her in. Yet another service her beloved prince has been deprived from by marrying me. Lucky for me, my MIL does not put any attention on my domestic shortcomings. As I stated earlier, she is part Mother Teresa.
So I may not be a domestic goddess… far from it! Over the years, I’ve gotten much better at accepting my deficiency in household chores and focus on the many gifts I bring to this home. Such as my stellar performances singing along to broadway musicals in the kitchen. Or the birthday parties I plan based on each child’s theme preference. Or my fantastical skillz at hosting Wine O’clock Wednesday Trivia, being able to drink wine WHILE talking for an hour straight!
